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Similar to emotional masturbation is pseudo-relationships, which can be described in two different ways.The first is when you’re dating someone who won’t commit to a relationship, yet all the while strings you along.‘The theory made so much sense for my own shortcomings when dating men because I’m also guilty of thinking “my parents are going to love him” and how well his last name will go with mine.’ Contrary to the statement made by the Betches, men do emotionally masturbate too.One woman, who wants to remain anonymous, tells us how earlier this year, she met a man from a dating app who gave her a bunch of red roses on the first date, and proposed on the second one.While men are likely to do this at the beginning of your romance, it’s more about having sex with you – as opposed to women, who it’s said will fantasise about everything from marriage to babies.We don’t approve of the stereotyping, but for the sake of research, let’s continue.‘For instance, girl meets guy or vice versa – and because they are conscious that they are missing out on something important in their life.

We’ll look at both of those perspectives in a moment.

But first, let’s not miss an application that’s as glaringly obvious as it is comforting: the weight biblically assigned to this sin is drastically out of proportion with the swelling of shame and self-loathing we experience when we masturbate.

I honestly wish I felt as bad about, say, lying, envy or murder.

Most of us have probably indulged in low-level emotional masturbation – because imagining a future with someone is natural – but the Beetches are specifically referring to a scenario in which you don’t actually know the other person well enough to do this.

For instance, you’ve been on two dates and he’s already ‘The One’ and you’re mentioning him to your friends over and over, convinced that this ‘relationship’ will be your best yet.

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