Funny dating rules teenagers
It seems harmless enough, but I feel like I need to have a more thoughtful approach to the advice my husband and I give, and the rules. Or rather, it means something very different from what we’d like it to mean.
Without getting personal, can you share some of your wisdom on teens and dating or not dating, that kind of thing? I’ve had conversations with older people about this topic, and you can tell that, in their vehement enthusiasm for dating, they are remembering something from a time so long ago… when there was plenty of cultural support for virginity before marriage, and the whole context was that you were aiming at getting together a family.
Thus, if a guy, of whatever age, is not in a position to get married, should he be dating?
We partner with third party advertisers, who may use tracking technologies to collect information about your activity on sites and applications across devices, both on our sites and across the Internet.In our times (and ever since college became a universal goal and marriage got later and later or even just dispensed with), we can hardly believe it, but it’s true — and many a girl would be rescued from a lot of heartache if she could just get married to a good guy already. I think that if young people were encouraged by their parents to see dating as a means to marriage, they would accept the idea that it’s unwise to go there if the answer to the question “are you ready to get married? Auntie Leila hastens to add that they should be encouraged to make friends, go in groups, see how their friends interact with family members, get to know lots of people, observe their conduct (as dear Jane Austen puts it*), and in general have fun and think about what makes a good and attractive companion.However, in our society, it’s unlikely that she would be dating a man capable of providing for her, although it’s possible even now (and I myself did meet the Chief at a young age — he’s 10 years older than me, so you can think about that! But an 18-year-old guy — extremely few in our society are able to set out providing for a family at that age. (Although, again, there are some rare, very responsible young men who own their own businesses or farms and could do it. ) because he isn’t capable of being serious about a girl. In our family we tell our kids that there is no reason to be alone with a person of the opposite sex if you are not in a position to (at least in theory) pursue marriage with them — if you don’t know them well enough for that to be a possibility.Deirdre tells me that she carried this one rule of ours with her to college and it gave her freedom without her ever thinking much about it — “There’s really no reason to be alone in private [as opposed to taking a walk or otherwise being in public] with a boy! I’m afraid we just have to let go of that dating idea, at least for now.”** Of course, in college, it’s even more important, since to them a dorm room feels like their “home” but it is in fact a room with… Keeping the door open whenever she had a male visitor kept her comfortable and prudence satisfied. It’s good to let our children know that we think it’s wonderfully normal for attractions to happen.